Fragility is a Vessel
脆弱是一个容器
Installation, 2024
This ordinary white bowl has been with me for over a year, and it is capacious enough to hold food for two meals or soup. Perhaps because of its long and frequent use, one time when I was washing the bowl, it first broke a large piece, and then two small pieces fell along the cracks.
I have been hesitant to buy a new one. The reason is probably ‘too busy to find time’, ‘want to save more’ and ‘think other bowls are not as good as it, just want to buy a same, but the place is too far away’… then I even continued to eat from this broken bowl for two more months. Sometimes, when I look at the grooves and veins around the edge, I feel that it is somehow very artistic, which gets to the point of making me chuckle. I find that if one really wants to make do, it seems like anything can be resigned to circumstances/muddle along.
These fragments carry the weight of revealing their fragility, and I become aware of the constant tightness in my life all along, as well as whether or not I'm trapping myself into something. Whether I am treating too harshly to myself. Last year when I was overwhelmed with the loss of one after another in life, someone told me ‘Remember that you are never a fragile person, you are strong.’ But now I have my response to that:
It’s okay to be sad.
It’s okay to be frail.
Fragility is a vessel,
Look, cracks are like ravines and hills.
这个普通的白瓷碗跟了我一年有余，它容量很大，可以盛放够吃两顿的食物，或是盛汤。也许是使用时间久也频繁，有一次洗碗的时候，它先是碎了一大片，后又沿着裂痕掉落了两个小片。
我迟迟没有去买新的。原因大抵是“实在太忙了抽不出空”、“想节省一些”与“觉得别的碗都不如它好，只想买个相同的，地方却太远了”，于是竟依然用这个破碎的碗继续吃了两个月的饭。有时看着边缘沟沟壑壑的脉络，觉得莫名很有艺术感，每每想到这里便到惹自己发笑的地步。我发现，若是实在想要凑合，好像任何事情都可以苟延残喘。
这些碎片承担着袒露自己脆弱的重量，我觉察到一直以来我生命中持续紧绷的状态，以及我是否把自己困在了什么里面。我是否对自己太苛刻了。去年面对生命中一个又一个的失去手足无措，那时有人告诉我说，你要记住你从来不是一个脆弱的人，你很坚强。而现在的我，也对此作出了回应：
悲伤是被允许的。
脆弱是被允许的。
脆弱是一个容器，
你看，裂痕如沟壑山丘。
I have been hesitant to buy a new one. The reason is probably ‘too busy to find time’, ‘want to save more’ and ‘think other bowls are not as good as it, just want to buy a same, but the place is too far away’… then I even continued to eat from this broken bowl for two more months. Sometimes, when I look at the grooves and veins around the edge, I feel that it is somehow very artistic, which gets to the point of making me chuckle. I find that if one really wants to make do, it seems like anything can be resigned to circumstances/muddle along.
These fragments carry the weight of revealing their fragility, and I become aware of the constant tightness in my life all along, as well as whether or not I'm trapping myself into something. Whether I am treating too harshly to myself. Last year when I was overwhelmed with the loss of one after another in life, someone told me ‘Remember that you are never a fragile person, you are strong.’ But now I have my response to that:
It’s okay to be sad.
It’s okay to be frail.
Fragility is a vessel,
Look, cracks are like ravines and hills.
这个普通的白瓷碗跟了我一年有余，它容量很大，可以盛放够吃两顿的食物，或是盛汤。也许是使用时间久也频繁，有一次洗碗的时候，它先是碎了一大片，后又沿着裂痕掉落了两个小片。
我迟迟没有去买新的。原因大抵是“实在太忙了抽不出空”、“想节省一些”与“觉得别的碗都不如它好，只想买个相同的，地方却太远了”，于是竟依然用这个破碎的碗继续吃了两个月的饭。有时看着边缘沟沟壑壑的脉络，觉得莫名很有艺术感，每每想到这里便到惹自己发笑的地步。我发现，若是实在想要凑合，好像任何事情都可以苟延残喘。
这些碎片承担着袒露自己脆弱的重量，我觉察到一直以来我生命中持续紧绷的状态，以及我是否把自己困在了什么里面。我是否对自己太苛刻了。去年面对生命中一个又一个的失去手足无措，那时有人告诉我说，你要记住你从来不是一个脆弱的人，你很坚强。而现在的我，也对此作出了回应：
悲伤是被允许的。
脆弱是被允许的。
脆弱是一个容器，
你看，裂痕如沟壑山丘。
24–09–2024